A Single Woman’s Blues 

Being single has its advantages, but honey, let me tell you … “singledom’s” disadvantages tend to surface more often than none. Sigh…

It’s been a total of 5 years, 7 months, 7 days, 12 hours, and 30 seconds (but, who’s counting) since I have been on a date … a real “man meets woman” kind of date. You know, the date before the date that requires both genders to engage in long (in the bed with the covers over your head) conversations until your iPhone reaches 1% battery power … You tend to laugh at his ( or her) jokes or tolerable semi-vulgar humor until you feel your “tinkle” about to reach the center of your new Victoria’s Secret pink seamless cotton blend underwear; share childhood stories of bravery (like the day you saved a kitten from the “fenitches” aka feline bitches); explore your similarities as well as your differences; and fall asleep hoping that dream you had the other night would somehow find a place in your reality. Double sigh… 

I refuse to lie or bend the truth a little or even a smidgen … being single sucks cow balls (for a lack of better idioms). Triple sigh…

Every girl dreams of finding her prince (yeah, after watching countless hours of Cinderella-esque movies) and every woman hopes to one day meet the mate to her soul. Many singles can only dream of having that one man (or woman) who would surprise her (or him) at the door with a Magic Mike XXL routine. Where art thou Channing Tatum? 

I often envision my inner and outer single self walking down or better yet, sashaying down a busy street in Manhattan. I’m tuned into my own beat (hair flowing, hips swinging, booty bopping, and calves on high octane) while keeping up with the after 5 “concrete jungle.” I’m like the ethnic version of Carrie Bradshaw. Ha! A Sex and the City remix. As many can tell, I wasn’t born with a one track mind. 

  
While I continue to travel down the freeway of singledom, I will continue to adore the woman I’m becoming. And, one day, just one day, I will realize that my earthbound love is more than just a figment of my imagination. 

During the single phase of your dating metamorphosis, love every inch of you … From your beginning to your rebirth (not quite the end). And, always remember, you were beautifully sculpted by Heaven’s Picasso. Now, this is truly an advantage of living life as a single woman. 

 

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