I said it. And, I will stand by every word. Being older and more mentally mature, I’ve come to the realization that some men will never live beyond their pubertal age. Hook-ups are for the socially awkward or those that lack a sense of self-respect or self-acceptance. As soon as I landed in the “City of Singletown,” I was approached by men with swelling penises and obscene pick-up lines … “I want to taste your chocolate” … “Can I come over to do you?” (Actual pick-up lines by the way). My reaction to such indecency usually involves the “black girl” eye roll or the “I know you didn’t” with a side-eye, slow eye roll, and sucking of the teeth.
Dodging protruding wankers and the sexual stench of desperation is not an easy task. These wild, monstrous, predatory, and “no respect having men” will do almost anything to attack their prey. It seems that they will “attack” aka (f-bomb) any woman with a vagina or anything that looks like a vagina. If a hairy and beastly (and I mean hair growing for decades-forget “No Shave November”) vagina (with no face, just legs) was just sashaying down the street, you would suddenly hear and see a mob of half-naked men coming out of sports bars, office buildings, and shopping centers (humping the air) … they would leap onto the estranged vagina like fleas on a wandering canine. I refuse to fall for the cheap and low-grade hook-up lines. If one can’t seem to carry a conversation or tap into his (half-empty) intellectual box, I’m NOT interested.
I’ve noticed that some men will get straight to it, right after the hello … “Hello Sexy, what are your plans tonight?” or “You are hot! Can I go home with you?” What about my name sir? WTH! Guys, not all women are looking to get laid or “get sacked.” We can go to the nearest “after dark” novelty shop and purchase a mighty big, long, and strong “power ranger” with multiple speeds … we can easily choose the color and girth.
Where are the mature, respectful, honest, and semi-comedic men? Could they be on planet Mars? I will say it again, hooking up is for the weak! Dating/Courting is becoming nonexistent here in the “City of Singletown.”