Say What Now

“Wait, run that by me again … you’ve never had an orgasm?” It is definitely a fact. Many women over the age of thirty never experienced the “orgasmic flow” … the “va-jay-jay that runneth over” … the “climactic rush” … the “pressure releaser” … the “spew of sweet nectar” … the “tears of the womb.”

Sorry fellas, some women have been faking the Big “O” (for quite some time) with eyes rolls (and you thought it was because you caused an orgasmic exorcism), with spasmodic –like episodes (and you thought you laid “it” down), and with a loud obnoxious moan (almost deafening). It was all just a show … a-not-so celebratory experience for her, but more of an explosion for him. Faking the Big “O” can be exhausting especially if the woman is not emotionally or mentally connected to her partner. For a small majority of women, an “orgasmic eruption” comes quite natural during intercourse or any other sexually generated act (damn, she was blessed with a golden glitter box).

Faking an orgasm comes natural for the other half of the female population. It’s like auditioning to play the role of the leading lady in a short film (“He Always Get His And I Never Get Mine”). Lights, Camera, Action! You lay there, he pulls it out … he climbs on top of you (wearing nothing but white socks) … he puts it in the wrong hole … you give him the “I know the hell you didn’t just try that shit” look … he struggles for a moment then finds the right hole … you moan and you groan … he huffs and he puffs … he whispers, “Do you like it?” … you lie, “Yes, now give it to me big daddy” … he goes faster, you scream his name (shouting every syllable) … he starts to perspire like he’s an olympian about to reach the finish line … you roll your eyes (hoping this shit is about to end) … he growls, he moans … he shakes, he rattles, and then he rolls over … you look at the clock hoping your telekinetic sense will move time backwards (you want ten minutes of your life back) … the END.

It is very pertinent that a woman knows her body, loves her body, and embraces the body she owns. Men must learn every inch of a woman’s body (Anatomy 101 is a great start). Know her turn-ons … her turn-offs (not just in a sexual sense). Mentally stimulate her with words of affection and declaration … more like a mental massage (could easily make her feen for your loving).

The Big “O” will be an even greater experience if both participants learn each other (e.g. his/her touch, his/her smell, his/her walk, and his/her vocal range during certain activities). It’s ok to think outside the bedroom … try something new, try something bold … be a rebel without a cause (just don’t get your ass arrested). Most importantly, experience the wild and crazy things  shit together.

Before I sound off, fellas, make her give dap (a fist pump) to the Lord himself (feed her mind, body, and soul). She will thank you and thank the Lord for blessing her with a modern-day superman (a man with telepathic and super-orgasmic powers).

Let’s Free the Flow!

Know Your Worth

There’s not a day that goes by where I don’t hear a woman complaining about her non-committal situation with a man (and sometimes with another woman). I’ve been there and often traveled down that non-committal road of temporary sexual satisfaction (mostly from him), frustration (not knowing where the “situationship” was going), anger (mostly because he didn’t text or call like he said he would), confusion (a part of me wanted to end it, but I didn’t want to be alone), trust issues (questioning his every move), blindness (purposefully ignoring the red flags or jumping over the roadblocks), and looking for love (looking for what I didn’t propose to myself).

I’m not feeding you any bull shit or trying to come off as a wailing bitch because “one man hurt me.” I speak from experience. I still don’t know it all, but my life experiences have taught me to be more on guard. I can honestly say, I stand as a woman who loves and appreciates herself.

If that complementary man was to fall from the sky and land on my doorstep (wishful thinking), I would be willing to share that love with him (never giving all of me … saving just enough for myself).

We often place ourselves in situations then blame the disastrous outcome on the other party. It’s not just the men … ladies, you play a major role in every sequel. Knowing your worth as a woman will open doors (not bedroom doors, but car doors, restaurant doors, museum doors … you get the picture). A woman’s worth is like a rare pearl just extracted from the shell of a mollusk … it is invaluable … it’s indissoluble … it’s the closest thing to the soul of a woman. A woman’s worth combined with a man’s courage may cause an out of body (or out of reality) experience.

Be a woman of stature! Know your worth!