Why are you Single?

Why are you single? Hell, if I knew the answer I wouldn’t be single and you wouldn’t keep inquiring about my dating life. I’m single because I choose not to settle for the first man who smiles in my face while licking his lips or gazing at my covered chest, a man who tells me I’m “hot” or “fine” or “sexy” (usually it’s not what you say it’s how you say it), a man who purposely tells me he’s single only to discover he’s married, engaged, or in another “situationship.”

It took me going through the many trials of dating and a broken marriage to realize my worth. Abstaining from sex has played a major role in building my self-value or self-worth. I no longer desire to hold the title of a “friend with benefits” … a “one night stand” … or a “hot piece of ass.”

Remember, when you allow a distressed man to enter your womb you become a part of him … the deleterious spermatozoa that he releases may contain a few of his unsettled demons (a “rubber” would be too weak to shield the vigor). So, think about that before you become intoxicated by the penis. This is far beyond being “drunk in love.”

And Ladies, you play a major role in the dating game. That thing between your legs has unmeasurable value and power. Respect yourself. If you don’t, he won’t either. And, stop believing that women can be like men in a sexual nature (where sex is just a physical thing). Most men usually think with the head of their “little man.” Eventually, you will catch feelings, you will sit by the phone hoping he’ll call, and you will beat yourself up asking, “Why did I even get involved?”

As women (and as men) we must take our time, be patient, and gain knowledge about the person whom we may one day call our “man (woman)” … our “boo” … our “husband (wife).”

I still believe there is someone for everyone … we aren’t equipped to love alone; it’ll take a mental, spiritual, and psychological connection.

3 thoughts on “Why are you Single?

  1. “Remember, when you allow a distressed man to enter your womb you become a part of him … the deleterious spermatozoa that he releases may contain a few of his unsettled demons (a “rubber” would be too weak to shield the vigor).”

    “And Ladies, you play a major role in the dating game. That thing between your legs has unmeasurable value and power. Respect yourself. If you don’t, he won’t either. And, stop believing that women can be like men in a sexual nature (where sex is just a physical thing).”

    I rather like these two pieces, because it is raw and not for the faint of heart. someone will read this and say that you are “slut shaming” or some other nonsensical response, all to appease to their feelings. When we refuse to accept accountability for our actions, we enter a state of victimhood. In this neighborhood, we believe we can say and do whatever we want, without any consequences.

    When the consequences arise, they then point blame at someone else, once again refusing to accept accountability. I see this again and again with so many women in the dating arena. They cry foul because they believe they cannot sleep around, without labels attached to the act. They attract poor dating choices, but blame others for the decisions. Guys are no different in making poor decisions of course, but we are taught from a young age to accept accountability and not to wallow in sadness–because no one cares. LoL. This message needs to spread.

    Great post

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      1. Sounds like a plan. I actually wanted to do something of this sort, for quite some time. I need someone who has a similar mindset. LOL. Someone who is not afraid to speak the truth. I believe any other way can never truly help people. The fairy tale land is just that–a fairy tale. Sometimes the message is not all ice cream and rainbows. Sometimes, the truth is gritty, but through the truth, you learn. Everyone cannot deal with this truth, but you get it. LoL. By reading your recent post, you get it. We should figure out a few ideas on what would work best. I greatly appreciate the positive words of acknowledgment,

        Like

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